Boring Day

     Second post of the day. At least I got something done. Went with Ryon to finally get some groceries. Weren't hurting butt we did need some. 3rd time buying some at the beginning of the month but I still don't feel that it's enough to contribute to my sister allowing me to stay here in the interim while I look for a job. I am still grateful for her doing this. Although quite often I feel excluded. One thing that has been very hard for me to cope with, has been the loneliness of it all. I feel that I have no friends. My family barely speaks to one another for the most part, let alone social calls. They have never been very accepting of personal issues like mental health. I was talking to someone that I met on hinge and the first 2 or 3 days were great. We talked to so much and it looked great on meeting up and seeing if the chemistry continued. Then starting Wednesday of this past week, she went silent. I eventually messaged her a couple of days later after a message on Thursday and one on Friday morning, before leaving a final statement stating that I hope that she was ok, and if she no longer wanted to talk to me, that the least she could was say so. I mean come on, really? People can't be adults nowadays and communicate.  Communication was a big topic of our conversations funny enough and she couldn't even do that in the end. 

    I would just like to find someone to be able to talk to everyday and see where it goes. It's hard feeling like you're alone.  I think tonight I might reach out to a couple of old timers of mine and see what's going on. I just don't see the conversations going very long because they never do. They are friends at a distance and there is nothing between us that keeps the conversation ignited. Just the cordialness of being a friend and listening for a few minutes. Everything being online now does it make it more convenient but not easier at all. I would just like to have someone. I think humans need and crave their other half by nature. I just want that to.